Closing Statements

And so this class ends as I slide a folder underneath the office door like I’m part of a heist. What a great way to end it: as randomly as it began for me. It feels almost surreal that I will never get to experience this class again, and it saddens me. I really enjoyed everyone’s company and will remember some of the great discussions that we had. I hope that all of you take the time to continue the blogs. I myself find that I enjoy talking about whatever I want without interruption. We all know how much I like to talk, but I digress. This class was a lot of fun, and I will take a lot of its lessons with me. I believe that we now have a better power to persuade, and I might go far enough to consider this one of my new talents. I have discovered my writing style, and I feel confident after completing a paper. Confidence is something that used to lack in the completion of a writing assignment, so that last part is pretty significant in my book. I learned the rules, and then was told it was okay, and beneficial to break them. How cool is that? Very cool! I wonder if it is still a bad rhetorical question if you answer it…. Apparently the one thing I didn’t learn in this class is how to avoid provoking your teacher’s pet peeve. Well, just letting you know that Frank the Platypus will remain open and somewhat updated in the near future, and I pressure you all to do the same. If not, good luck with your futures, class, and if I don’t see you have a good life!

This Is The Title Of My Last Blog Post, Believe It Or Not

Tuesday marked the beginning of my Great Facebook Social Experiment. Beginning at 6 PM, I started a week-long project in which I would use my phone to update my status on Facebook to detail every single thing I do throughout the day.

I've been falling a bit lax on the project in the past 24 hours, but I remain committed to my cause. Granted, I don't really know exactly what my cause is, but I know it's important. Part art project, part social experiment, I have found the process interesting and illuminating, as well as exhausting and mind-numbing. To explain it to my roommate, I referenced the only episode I have ever seen of "Dharma and Greg," in which Dharma lives in the window of a museum for a week as a living exhibit. Luckily for me, that episode is also the only one my roommate has seen of that show, so he understood exactly where I was coming from.

The data is still being collected (right now I am "doing homework" -- a rarely-seen status update, even during finals week), but looking back on my week, I have already learned one thing: I don't do anything ever. My roommate and I have been watching "The Wire" on DVD, so a huge amount of my updates just say "Danny is watching 'The Wire.' "

I also had diarrhea on Thursday, so it was extremely embarrassing to frequently have to write, "Danny is in the bathroom." Of course, I just flat-out said I had diarrhea in this post, but it was much more embarrassing to know that everyone else knew I was on the toilet right that very second.

One downside is that it completely prevents me from lying about where I am or what I'm doing. I learned that in my first day of the experiment, when a friend invited me to a place I did not want to go to, only to respond with, "No you're not," when I tried to claim I was busy. "You're watching TV right now," he insisted.

The experiment rages on, but here are some notable status updates from the past week, as well as the feedback I have gotten from various observers (last names edited to protect my friends from having to admit they are friends with me):

10:18pm Danny is watching Bodnar do the rest of the dishes and talking to Jake, Rae and Jon.

10:40pm Danny is feeding Antony.
10:42pm Danny is feeding Apollo.
10:50pm Danny is back in the kitchen, talking to Jon, Jake, Rae and Bodnar again.

11:16pm Elizabeth: i'm loving this, by the way.

11:46pm Danny is watching Bodnar try to empty Apollo's anal glands.
11:55pm Elena: oh dear...
11:56pm Danny is outsmarting Apollo. He can't hide his asshole from 4 of us!

3:30pm Danny is making a salad.
3:39pm Danny is eating a salad.
3:45pm Danny is making burritos. Salad just ain't enough, man.

10:21am Danny is showering.
10:38am Danny is drying off.
10:39am Danny is getting dressed.

7:58pm Danny is drinking.

8:14pm Otis: ...again.

8:15pm Danny is considering punching Otis when he gets home.
8:15pm Otis: ...again.

It's important to note that "Otis" is more commonly known as Mr. Otis - my English teacher sophomore year of high school.

Frank's Last Stand

For my last blog post I thought it would be appropriate to talk about how much I enjoyed this class. Being able to write and respond to topics on a blog every week was very engaging, and was something that I never would have expected for a Comm B course. It was also fun to have discussions during class time. Being a senior, it seems that a majority of the classes that I’ve taken over the past two years have been people going for the same major, and it was refreshing if not reminiscent of freshmen year, to be able to interact regularly with people going on different paths once again.
For the remainder of my blog, I think I’ll talk about what I did today (yes this may seem like a lame move, but play along this could be fun). I started off the day by waking up at around 8 o’clock and deciding right away that I was going to skip the first and only class I had today. Instead I decided to go for a run with my black lab, Jaeger. After cleaning myself up and having a bite to eat I started to do some laundry, while convincing myself that I was doing homework; in reality I was actually playing video games with my roommates. Not to soon after my distraction I put in another round of laundry, and went outside to work on my truck; the four wheel drive has been giving me some trouble lately, but I think that I can get it to work better if I could just engage the actuator manually, as opposed to using the malfunctioning, electric, push-button in the cab. After much fiddling and cussing, I emerged from beneath the truck both cold and greasy, however my frozen keister seems to have not been in vain, for my scheme seems to be working. In order to reward myself I made a delicious meal of jambalaya and a venison steak marinated in my own secret jalapeño BBQ sauce, with some homemade pecan pie for a dessert (I really enjoy cooking- a skill inherited from my mother I believe- and though unorthodox, pies have always been my specialty). Finally at the end of the day, I find myself at my computer writing this blog. Perhaps later I may go out and have a beer at the Essen Haus, with my roommates, but that has yet to be determined.
As this is my final post, I would like to thank all you dedicated fans for following my work these long months. I would also like to give a special thanks to my most dedicated fan, Christine, who has followed all of my posts. Thanks again, and please be gentle on the grading.

Asian Carp - Who Needs 'Em?

Why, hello.

Frank the Platypus will be focusing on the menace that is known as Asian Carp for its research project.

For those of you who have already forgotten our life-changing PowerPoint presentation, let me refresh your memory:

Asian Carp are bad. They are invading our bodies of water and killing everything. They must be stopped before they take over the Great Lakes. They can also jump out of the water and kill you. They want nothing less than to destroy all of us.

And, if you're stumped, the answer to our word search was, " 'Get involved and save your Great Lakes!' says Frank the Platypus." Congratulations to everyone who solved it, and congratulations to the members of Frank the Platypus, who created it.

Leave your thoughts on our project in the comments, please. Don't worry, we will accept negative feedback, although we prefer stuff like, "You guys are awesome!" and attractive girls' numbers.

Good night, happy Thanksgiving, and remember: save a turkey, eat a carp.

When I Was a Young Warthog

I always enjoyed watching Disney movies. When I was little, I remember that my movie choice was only concerned with the one row on the shelf that was slightly bigger than the others (those Disney cases didn’t fit in the other rows). Now my movie selection is a little bigger, but I still find myself from time to time watching a classic. I remember once when I was almost seventeen and decided to watch the Lion King. It was Friday night and I was at my house by myself, and it seemed like a great way to add to how pathetic it was. It’s different to watch a Disney movie when you are older because you actually understand what’s going on and don’t just enjoy the cartoon colors and toddler jokes. I remember watching Timon and Pumba singing “Hakuna Matata” and the idea that it sparked in my head. It completely changed my perception of High School and got me through its rigorous trials. I will never forget that phrase that was sung to me by a warthog, and….whatever Timon is. I was enlightened by their message. I can only hope that I was a late bloomer in realizing that life shouldn’t be taken so seriously. I hope that all the other children that watched that movie were able to take out of it a great life lesson, and I’m sure that is Walt Disney’s intent in his movies…well that and making money. It is interesting to consider Disney movies rhetorically, because it is now clear to see how these movies convey their message. Bright colors, song and dance, comedy, and other factors that stimulate the imagination are the foundation of these movies. The producers do a great job of sparking the imagination of its audience in a way that enables them to portray a clear message of happiness and bliss. I hope that Disney movies are not out of date by the time I have children so that I can share with them the messages that they taught me. Also, it will provide me with an excuse to legitimately own the whole collection.